anxiety – What you left me with

I Can’t Get Up

It will be 6 months this week since you left me, I know it’s time to get up. I can feel people’s patience wearing thin with me but each step feels like the impossible task. I can feel the world moving on without me and part of me desperately wants to jump on board butContinue reading “I Can’t Get Up”

Who Was I Living With?

I decided it was time to delete the secrets from your computer and phone. That I try and move past the betrayal. Before I did I couldn’t help but take one more look around and that’s when I found it. The darkest thing yet. You went on a fetish dating site. You used the detailsContinue reading “Who Was I Living With?”

Sorry it’s been a while

Sorry it’s been a while F. I promise I’ve been thinking of you, in fact I do pretty much nothing but. I’m somehow on the other side of Christmas without you. It was awful. I screamed on the day. By Boxing Day I was paralysed. I had to get someone else to watch the pupContinue reading “Sorry it’s been a while”

I Just Need You

I am desperate to talk to you, to be comforted by you, to be held by you. The pup’s leg is really bad, she’s barely standing on it again and we both need you. We buried your ashes on Friday, it was the hardest part so far. So final, you were in such a smallContinue reading “I Just Need You”

Crippling Anxiety

You ripped the world out from under my feet 3 times in 3 months. The first was when the doctors told us it was advanced cancer and I realised all the results you had given me, the blood tests, the appointments, the decisions on your health care, the fucking mouthguard in my house were fabrications,Continue reading “Crippling Anxiety”