The Nothingness

That’s where you are, your consciousness has ended, you experience nothing and you remember nothing. I am nothing to you now. That is what I want, the nothingness, the end. I notice online lots of people screaming for help to get rid of these thoughts but I welcome them. I don’t share them with anyoneContinue reading “The Nothingness”

Crippling Anxiety

You ripped the world out from under my feet 3 times in 3 months. The first was when the doctors told us it was advanced cancer and I realised all the results you had given me, the blood tests, the appointments, the decisions on your health care, the fucking mouthguard in my house were fabrications,Continue reading “Crippling Anxiety”

Everyone else’s needs

They lost you too and they lost me with you. I try to remember that, I try to remember their guilt, they used to listen to me talk about your health, our issues, some of them begged me to leave for my own sanity. Some of them are the only people who saw you butContinue reading “Everyone else’s needs”